How to Talk So Kids Will Listen & Listen So Kids Will Talk
by Adele Faber and Elaine Mazlish
The 1980 classic on communicating with children: acknowledge feelings, engage cooperation without threats, alternatives to punishment, encourage autonomy, praise descriptively, free children from roles. The cartoons and exercises make it practical, and the methods work on adults too. Still the best parenting communication book.
Read it if…
you are a parent and your words are not working.
Skip it if…
you want a philosophy of parenting; this is pure skills.
Three things you will actually use
- Acknowledge the feeling before the fix.
- Describe what you see instead of judging.
- Give choices within limits.
Do this first
Next time your child is upset, name the feeling and say nothing else for ten seconds.
Our verdict
A timeless skills book; every parent should own it.
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