The Seven Levels of Intimacy
by Matthew Kelly
Clichés, facts, opinions, hopes and dreams, feelings, faults and fears, legitimate needs: the seven levels relationships move through, and why most stall at three. A map for going deeper.
Read it if…
your relationships stay at opinions and never reach fears.
See the book →
Skip it if…
you want research; see Gottman.
Try instead: Men Are from Mars, Women Are from Venus →
Three things you will actually use
- Seven levels; most stall at three.
- Share hopes, then feelings, then fears.
- Legitimate needs are the deepest level.
Do this first
Identify which level your closest relationship lives at.
Our verdict
Seven levels.
See the book →
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