Codependent No More
by Melody Beattie
The 1986 book that named codependency for a general audience: the caretaking, controlling and self-abandonment of people attached to addicts and others in trouble, and the recovery through detachment, self-care and boundaries. It is written in a plain, recovery-program voice and remains the starting point for the subject.
Read it if…
you are consumed by managing someone else's problems and have lost yourself.
Skip it if…
you want clinical rigor; the concept is popular, not diagnostic.
Three things you will actually use
- Detach with love; it is not abandonment.
- You did not cause it, cannot control it, cannot cure it.
- Take care of yourself; it is not selfish.
Do this first
Identify one thing you do for someone that they can do themselves, and stop.
Our verdict
The classic; plain and helpful.
Compare with other Relationships books
Too Good to Leave, Too Bad to Stay
Mira Kirshenbaum · Relationships
Direct and useful for the stuck.
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