The Mastery of Love
by Don Miguel Ruiz
Ruiz applies his Toltec framework to relationships: we are wounded and defend ourselves with emotional poison; love is not need or control; the only person you can change is yourself; relationships are two halves who each must be whole. It is simple, repetitive and parable-based, and the central image of the 'magical kitchen' stays with readers.
Read it if…
you keep looking for a partner to complete you and want a different picture.
Skip it if…
you want research on relationships; see Gottman or Johnson.
Three things you will actually use
- Love yourself first; need is not love.
- Do not take your partner's wounds personally.
- Respect: let them be who they are.
Do this first
List what you expect your partner to provide that you could provide yourself, and start with one.
Our verdict
Simple and gentle; a parable on self-love.
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