The Science of Trust
by John M. Gottman
Gottman's research-heavy account of trust in couples: the trust metric, betrayal as a cascade of small turnings-away, attunement, the sliding-door moment, and how trust is rebuilt. It is denser than his popular books and the game-theory sections are for the determined.
Read it if…
you want the research under the Gottman advice.
Skip it if…
you want the practical version; see Seven Principles.
Three things you will actually use
- Trust is built in small moments of turning toward.
- Betrayal begins with negative comparison.
- Attunement is a skill set.
Do this first
Read the chapter on sliding-door moments and notice three this week.
Our verdict
The research under the advice.
Compare with other Relationships books
Ten Lessons to Transform Your Marriage
John M. Gottman, Julie Schwartz Gottman and Joan DeClaire · Relationships
The method, on transcripts.
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The Man's Guide to Women
John Gottman, Julie Schwartz Gottman, Douglas Abrams and Rachel Carlton Abrams · Relationships
The research, for men.
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Created for Connection
Sue Johnson and Kenneth Sanderfer · Relationships
Hold Me Tight, for Christians.
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